Placenta Love

Front and Center, I have full faith in the placenta and the work it does. This inspires me to write more on the postpartum, but for today I thought I would share with you a photo sent to me from clients who birthed recently. I had gave them the table, re-finished with chalkboard paint. The message sat on the table for the week prior to the momma's birth, and here you see the home and life force of her sweet baby girl. Thank you for sharing this picture. May all readers explore the health and benefits of placentas in the postpartum, whether you ingest it or plant it. I love this photo. Thank you placenta.

Storytelling

I love the art of storytelling. When it comes to a birth story, the reflection of a woman comes out as she proudly announces her experience and her new arrival. I love birth stories. I love them when they are flowery and juicy. I love them when they are three sentences long. It's rare you get the birth attendants birth story, because it's not our birth. We can always add our part. From my perspective, this mother had enduring confidence in herself and trusted every step of the way. When a birth unfolds, such as Jenna and Morgan's birth unfolded, it is sometimes unimaginable that the birth process can be so quick. I had yet to check her cervix when she got the first urge to push and when I asked her to breathe through some of the initial "pushie" contractions. When her body began to shake with hormones and the look in her eye said, "Let's birth this baby," the process began. I believe a mother's body knows best. I love being reminded every birth has it's own tune, and we as the midwives and doctors must learn to dance a new dance every single birth. Sometimes, we can repeat the steps...but that is on a rare and blue moon. Thank you Dodge's! Enjoy the beginning of a new moon phase and also the new week!

Morgan Perry Dodge, born at 7:23 a.m. on Saturday, May 29, 2010. He weighed 7 lbs 12 oz, is 19" long, with a 15" head circumference. Here is his story:

I woke up at 1:14 a.m. to a sharp, painful contraction. I went into the bathroom, not wanting to wake up Ben, and came back to bed a couple of minutes later. I tried to go to sleep but was awakened by another contraction at 1:27 a.m. Again, I headed to the bathroom, but at this point I was a little bit scared and shaken up, so when I came to bed, I woke up Ben. I told Ben that I had had 2 contractions and I wanted him to sit with me through the next one, and we could start to time them. I told Ben that I thought they felt much different than anything else I had felt before. I was a little shaky and feeling really scared, honestly. I think that I knew it was the real thing happening, but I didn't want to say it out loud.

We don't have any regular watches or anything to easily time the contractions, so Ben quickly downloaded an app for his Droid that times the contractions for you. Gotta love technology! After about 5 more contractions that came at most 5 minutes apart, we called the midwives (Rebecca Egbert and Erin Ellis of the Green Midwife Community Birth Services). Rebecca advised that we try to relax and sleep through them (yeah, right!), and that maybe we get into the water, and to call her back in an hour. We filled the tub and I sat in it for a few contractions, but I found that I wanted to move, and the tub wasn't big enough for me to move in. I really liked the hands and knees position, or the knees-to-chest position, so I sat through a few contractions on the bed in the knees to chest position. I really liked that.

At 3 a.m. or so, we called Rebecca again to give her an update, per her request. Again, she advised that we try to rest through the contractions and we agreed to call her back when we wanted her to come over.

Around 3:30 a.m. I decided that I should call my Mom to have her make the drive from Missoula. I hadn't wanted to call before 4 a.m., but at this point, I wasn't sure I she was going to make it if I called any later. We didn't tell her how close the contractions were (3 minutes from start to start!) because we were worried about her making the drive as it were, being so early in the morning.

Around 4 a.m., we called Rebecca again. I was feeling a little "pushy" but knew that I should be trying to resist the urge, because I didn't want to push before I was fully dilated. But, realizing that things were progressing quickly, we called Rebecca and told her we wanted her to come over. She told Ben that "She's probably only 2 or 3 cm right now, and she'd come over, but it still might be a while". Ben hung up the phone, relayed the message. In the next contraction my water broke (4:14 a.m.) and I told Ben that "if I'm only 2 or 3 cm dilated, I don't think I can do this!" It was intense, and because I had no previous experience to compare it to, I was worried that perhaps I was only 2 or 3 cm dilated and not just not nearly as "tough" as I thought I would be!

Rebecca made her way over, showed up at around 4:45, at which point I was laboring on the toilet or in the hands and knees position, hanging on Ben's lap. I was very vocal during the contractions, and I was surprised at how natural it felt to vocalize, and how I didn't feel self-conscious about it at all, even though I thought I would be. Rebecca took one look at me and said "Okay, I'll get set up", realizing I think that we didn't have as long as she thought we would with most first time mamas.

The advice to resist the urge to push continued, I'm not sure how long, but maybe for another hour even. I finally told Rebecca that I just couldn't resist anymore - it was taking all of my willpower and concentration, and I found myself pushing during contractions, like I couldn't help it. She did a quick check, determined I was fully dilated, and gave me the go-ahead to push!

Pushing was WAY better than not pushing. It hurt, sort of, but it was also incredibly rewarding. I could reach in and feel Morgan's head, and I could feel him enter the birth canal. It was awesome. It definitely did hurt a bit, and I was afraid of the "ring of fire" that I've heard about, which is the burning sensation you get as the tissues of the vagina get stretched to the maximum. However, I knew it was inevitable, so I might as well embrace it. We ended up pushing for about 30-35 minutes, primarily in the squat position, with me resting between contractions hanging on Ben's legs (he was seated behind me in a chair). We ended up giving the final push in the hands-to-knees position, which proved the absolute most effective at that point.

When he was born, Ben immediately said "It's a boy!" and I exclaimed "Oh! He's so cute!" I was expecting the typical Winston-Churchill look-alike newborn, but to me, MY baby was cute :) I guess that's the maternal love hormone cocktail working it's magic. I wish we had gotten the birth on video like we had planned, but everything happened so fast that I forgot to get the video camera upstairs, and for that matter, I didn't show anyone how to use it, and I even forgot that we had a video camera until I was pushing. We did get lots of birth photos that we are making a slideshow out of so I'll share those soon :)

Reflecting on the event, the thing that surprised me the most was that I never felt like I needed or wanted any drugs. The only time I had any self doubt was when the contractions started up for the first time. Well, and then when Rebecca said she thought I might be at 2 or 3 cm is all, but I knew that she wasn't here to see me so she was just guessing. At least, I had hoped she was very wrong!

Afterwards, Ben asked me if it was the hardest thing I've ever done. I thought for a minute, and said "No". It wasn't, really. It was intense, and it definitely wasn't easy, physically. But, it was easy in the sense that I trusted my body to do what it needed to do, and I knew that whatever was going to happen wasn't optional. My body was going to give me a certain amount of pain/stress, and it was up to me to handle that pain in the best way I could. I also knew that, like everything else in life, this too, shall pass. I just kept thinking about the fact that when this was over, the pain would be gone, and I would have my baby in my arms.

However, if Ben had asked me the same question sometime between 5 and 7 a.m., I might have had a very different answer for him. That's the thing about natural birth - it only sucks when you're in it, and then you immediately forget.

Thanks, oxytocin!

A Conscious Woman

Inspired to give a tip of the week, I come upon the Conscious Woman Website and the work of Gloria Lemay as I wait for the current downpour to reside. Gloria leads a series of webinars named, "Essentials of Maternal-Infant Care." Take some time to check out the webinar options as a birthing woman, midwife, physician, doula, or anyone interested in Gloria's perspective.

Thank you Gloria and to the women of Conscious Woman!

Thank you notes

A first for this midwife...During midwifery school, I wrote a thesis called "The Greening of Birth." A considerable portion of this paper focuses on the collaboration of maternity care providers to greatly reduce the rising maternal mortality rate in the United States. This means midwives and OB/MD's work together when they need to in order to keep birth healthy and safe. Once I started my practice, I did my best to say "thank you" when we transported to our local hospital for the care a midwife cannot provide. I wanted to begin building connection and community for myself as a provider, and for my clients/patients. I still send them every transport.

Two weeks ago, I transported a momma who planned to birth at home. The onset of pre-eclampsia and her baby turning breech brought her to a hospital birth. We met with an fantastic OB, Melissa Augustyn. The parents asked for the hospital to follow their birth plan, a usual occurrence. Dr. Augustyn was very supportive of their requests. When asked if I could be support during my client's birth, for a cesarean, she told us that a recent hospital policy kept any supporters other than the partner out of the surgical theater. Dr. Augustyn "pushed" to get everything these parents wanted for their birth, and therefore I was allowed to attend my client during her birth. The surgical staff was very respectful to the "sacred" birth environment and to this mother, as she birthed her sweet baby girl. I was with my client in the recovery room, as father and baby went through the rituals of the nursery. When I left the hospital that day, I was amazed at the day. Two weeks later. I went to clean out my office yesterday and checked the mail. There was a letter from Melissa expressing gratitude. She said she was writing a note to me at the same time she received mine. I like that kind of synchronicity. In a system where there is plenty of bureaucracy, it is heartwarming and human to know that we are on the way to making collaborative systems in maternity care.

As the rise in "The Greening of Birth" and maternity care begins, I am excited for more midwives to show what we DO know and what we have learned. We can send the continual message that we are the experts in normal birth and pregnancy. I am thrilled for more midwives to receive recognition from other maternity care providers, creating that collaborative force.

With this, I am also reminded every birth is magical.

Maiden-Mother-Crone

This morning my momma started an email with the following sentence, "Bec, since the day you were born, you have stolen my heart--just like your sister did-- and I have wanted you to have a perfect life." It was in this new day that I (not having yet birthed any children, yet witnessing many births) had an

ah-haa moment knowing that every mother I know wants the same thing for their sons and daughters that my mother wants for us.

In old traditions, the cycles of women were known as "Maiden-Mother-Crone." We enter times, now, where not every woman becomes a mother, physically. But energetically, there are many ways to tend to children and become a mother. We all have something in our lives that 'on the day it was born' our hearts broke wide open and our souls poured out, and whomphhh, we hope and pray that little thing has a perfect life. Yet, who gets a perfect life?

Maiden, we are, from birth until we start to swell and gestate. If you are a woman who choose not to gestate a baby, what in life have you been gestating, nourishing and caring for over time? What are you gestating today? What have you mothered to creation and continued to love, just like a child? Here in this place, we play, we create a mess and start over again, we experience joy, we fall in love, and we find ourselves.

Mother...Your body swollen, life force running through you, you caring for one thing like you've never cared for yourself. During gestation, what has inspired you creatively? What do you fear about the transition and how is this fear eased? How will this maiden transform into a mother? My mother has been a constant blessing, even when challenging, to the progression of my life. She is the only woman who believes in me with such strength and yet challenges me until I push off...She is probably like this because I "pushed off" from her womb in about 4 minutes once she actually began to push in labor. After the birth of becoming Mother, we grow up. Even if you become a mother later in life, you get to grow up AGAIN. Can you see the joy? Every birth, we grow into motherhood further and further. We get wrapped up in our "seeds" and tend to them, as we tend to ourselves, our commitments and to life. Age comes to us and our wised souls watch as our families evolve, our children(metaphoric or physical) leave us and begin their own lives; and as Mother, as woman, we begin again.

The wise woman, the Crone, the auntie, the grandmother, this woman passes on the wisdom, the lessons and the unconditional love that she has experienced throughout life. She holds her daughter as she births her babies, life dreams, goals and losses. She endures the magic that is passed through our ancestors and generations, hoping to pass it on to a "seed" that will carry this wisdom into the wind. Her hair is gray, lines show in her face, and after years of watching her mother's and aunt's hold the wisdom she begins to carry the torch.

With my birth sister about to have a baby, we three women represent Maiden-Mother-Crone and what a profound time it is in our lives. Midwives "mother" women into motherhood all the time. Today, I write this as a new mother sits at home with her week old baby girl and to me revels in the love she feels. Today, I write this for all of you exploring your phases in womanhood. May you find light in your transformation.

Blessed be!

New Sprouts

Once again, I have taken a hiatus from the world of the web. Inspired by many recent opportunities, I have thought focusing on this blog rather than a blog, facebook, twitter and all the ways to reach out. Let's say, I am synchronizing my efforts so I can produce something good, a resource for those who want to be inspired by birth and midwifery and the ways of parenting. Maybe in this redirection, there are also days when I just write to the Green Midwife community about happenings, creative ventures and new learnings in Midwifery.

So...what have I been up to since February? Let me introduce what my small practice has been doing...we've been growing.

Simon was born to Robin and Pat back in February, on a very snowy day. He was a sweet little guy who has brought lots of light to the life to us.

Modina Millie Mattie was born to Modina Sr and her father Dave in March. She came to us 5 weeks early, and she showed

exemplary vitals and was able to go straight to her momma's chest where she started nursing and she truly hasn't stopped since.

Ania Lynn was born next, on her family farm, and she came quite quickly...All 9 lbs 1 ounce of her. It was one of those midwifery births that restores all vision and clarity to the reasons why I love this job with all my soul. (This picture got removed from facebook for being "obscene").

And finally, sweet little baby Trinci Blue was born in the wee hours of the morning. Her momma gave all her go with the pushing and around 2 in the morning she slid out into everyone's arms. Many people had been waiting for this birth, and it all came in perfect time.

With the other birth centers in town thriving and I trying to find my place in this midwifery community, I realize Green Midwife has been thriving too. In February, Erin Ellis, CPM, LM moved to Bozeman and it's been wonderful to have build a new friendship and really like a big breath of fresh air has come around town. We all welcome her to the community and know she will add new light. It is our hope that we can work together to bring more unity to the local midwives and inspire more frequent gatherings, peer reviews and continuing education opportunities that make midwifery an empowering job and build better communities. A fun journey is ahead of us.

I got to take a vacation to Louisiana and Texas, to visit my boyfriend Ross where he is working on his family farm. It was an opportunity for me to reconnect with my heritage and a time to learn about his history, being my family comes from Southwestern Louisiana/East Texas and his from North Louisiana. We met up briefly with some Green Midwife clients who birthed about a year ago, in Austin, and of course beautiful Sara Janssen and her traveling family caught the moment on camera. In there, I have had some time with family. My lovely older sister Jennifer and her partner Sky are expecting their first baby in August. If that baby comes in August, I will be the only woman in our direct lineage not born in August. Thank heavens for my aunt Marilyn, who is born in September.

Finally, Green Midwife is moving out of the Main Street office in Bozeman on June 1st. As spring sprouts new life, so do I to this blog and to the other arenas of an enjoyable midwifery practice. New horizons are on the way for this midwife in Bozeman and I am looking forward to watching the growth of my practice here in Montana.

Over valleys and mountains

I started an email to a friend this morning this way:

Ever wake up and have one of those days of liberation? I did this morning and I realize that everyday we can imagine the wrongs and the rights, but what about just believing and encouraging the ones we love and ourselves into being or doing exactly what each of us is going after? So much creation.

Inspired by the reflective work I have been doing, while waiting for 2 mother's to birth their babies in to being I am also presented with my own daily life. With space and time for reflection, I am reminded how we delay and liberate one another. How by, in birth per say, an energy present in a room that doesn't believe in the birth happening because it's taking too long, or a cervix isn't dilating fast enough or whatever it is in thought CAN and often does hold a mom back from birthing naturally. For the simple women, birthing women are at their peak of intuition during the birth process and they pick up on everything. The reality is that we all need support. That we all need a spine to lean against every now and again, because we can sometimes forget that our spine holds all our weight every day. Our spines give us the backbone to stand tall, reach wide, embrace, and let all that weight sag with relaxation so we can restore.

I come to the time in my year to re-certify my neonatal resuscitation certification, so I will be heading down to Salt Lake City for a day course with Karen Strange. Her teachings always remind me that newborns breath, more than less. She empowers providers to believe that NNR is not as stressful and frightening as we imagine. I have had frightening in my life. However, inspiring a newborn to breathe who is taking it's own time to come around is not frightening after my time with Karen and seeing how gentle midwifery resuscitations are and can be. Midwives, always remember this, care for low-risk, healthy women and full term pregnancies (generally) so the resuscitations we see are very different than those in the hospital with preterm newborns or newborns whose mother's receive medication during labor. Okay, so your adrenals pump when you have to help a newborn breathe-it's just different.

As I read through these study guides and manuals, I thought about how much we in our quick paced society forget to breathe. And what happens on a cellular level when we forget to breathe? What tension is created? Do we create disease? Or do we just ignore and move on, sort of thinking we're breathing? I think breath is the most important food I can eat each day. Fortunately, I have chose to breathe mostly clean mountain air that inspires me to live deeper, wildly and in tune with myself in relation to the earth. Fortunately, I have chose to explore breath taking views as often as I can. What I am remembering right now, the last few years I was committed to a different process than breath taking views. Committed to the process of learning a new teaching, midwifery and the normal birth process, and now that I am a working midwife I can return to my normal breathing pattern. I can return to breath taking views, but as a solo midwife I have to make and plan for that time.

So what am I breathing: powder when I can, my health, my new family, snow, my feet touching the earth, water, the wild feminine, a good dog, reconnection from the past that bring love and light, both feet in, my natural consciousness returning, art and furniture design thoughts, and always ways to better and expand my business so when I do want to travel I can take every minute of every day of that time to release and grow and leave the place better than I found it.

Peace to you.

ecology of a sunday

where i wake with a call to attend a birth, i come home clean and know this assignment lie ahead. an assignment of ritual and everyday an intention in my life so that I, by choice, can live a life of spirituality, love and peace. settling into a practice today takes a little energy, as there are tomatos roasting in the oven and 2 antsy dogs sit by my feet. the sky was purple as I left the house this morning and there were low clouds over the mountains, a magical and mystical day for a baby to be born and a new mother and father to birth into parenthood. Ravens were flying low in the sky and as if the clouds were trying to break, moisture seeps in and replaced those spaces. The sun broke mid-morning or maybe around noon, just as this baby came onto the planet and into the arms of it's mom and dad. As I finish my practice, rise from my seat and come to this screen my feet are cold and I have to sit by the fire even though my internal oven is on...my external oven needs stimulation. In my practice today, I left for a moment but the dogs decided when the spirits came into the house that they'd start barking just to let them know who's protecting the house. Well Bob started barking, me knowing he can pick up on those present energies around my house when I practice. home. open flow, thoughts coming into awareness and then letting them release. I have this ability after enough practice to recognize my mind versus awareness. I know that in awareness I am me and that even if my heart is broken that this place is warm, comforting and love abundant love from the universe flows here and reminds me I will heal, I am healing. I am healed. Fresh snow hit the mountains today and that clean protective energy is what surrounds me right now. Today I did most everything I love for an autumn sunday, but instead of me being the teacher of awareness I practice my sober journey to a mind and body and spirit and heart that embraces that vast expanse that is my awareness...as if the stars were shining and filling the nights sky, there I know I breathe, there I know I heal, there I know I rest, there I know I can enter it crazy, and there I know I can leave that crazy and come back peace. Buzzed. high. Flying. Sometimes in my practice, I visit with my teachers even if I haven't seen them in a long time. They give me a lesson, give me a hymn to my own sacred body, and I do this on my own. How did I get to this place? Why was I drawn to know another part of my mind, the part where my magic is held. A part of my mind where shamanism grows, like a seed, and it's always been inside of me.

The ecology of my magic today started by taking some breaths, driving to a birth, having quiet and peace of mind, and watching as the landscape and environment that is my home moved and swirled and inhaled and exhaled and touched. Like a rise and fall, it reminded me it's just a sunday and I am just a normal girl, living in a vast valley that could be the center of the universe wherever that really is.

As Time Passes

Each year, life slows down a bit, roots set in and yet somehow I turn more and more into the energetic mother and father that raised me. Never did I think I would rise and do as much as they did by 8 am, yet now @ the young age of 33 I do exactly as they did. More and more, I think the cajun blood that runs thick in my veins keeps me on track towards a vibrant, rich, youthful, and aging life. Good thing we believe in strong coffee, and just so that you might get a grit or two in your cup. My friends can attest to the powers that be in the cups I brew.

Three months ago I sat in a hospital room and witnessed a beautiful birth experience; and then I went off-call for the rest of summer. Shortly after this birth, I met Dr. Holcomb Johnston and we talked about bringing two small businesses into one and creating a resource in town for preventative and holistic healthcare. The establishment of this professional relationship was exciting. As two people should "court" one another, whether professionally or personally, we did just that and both of our independent businesses grow more with each week. We're at this edge, where summer has passed and we're looking at ways we can collaborate our current studies to enhance the lives and health of Bozeman community members. It doesn't surprise me that we found one another, our degrees of separation are too close. Green Midwife moved down to Main Street in July, which prompted a lot of growth and change in my practice.

As I moved, the phone started ringing. Not off the hook, but it was this acknowledgement to me that midwives have to come out of the basements of office buildings and have to hang a shingle out on a limb and continue to normalize midwifery, whether it's in the hospital or at home. I went from zero to 80 in a week. Holcomb would make comments about how she wanted to be busy, I would tell her to be careful what she wished for because her time would come. Three months later, her schedule fills easily. I picked up a client for September, knowing that August was still a month planned off. A month saved for a dear-hearted wedding and my father's memorial service. They agreed, as we hit it off, and continued care with their provider through September.

August was month to crack me open. I took it on. I drove to the west coast and back to Montana, turned around three days later and drove to Iowa to celebrate with my daddy's closest friends and family, celebrate my momma's birthday and my parent's 40th anniversary. When it comes to parties, the women in our family can cook but organization is not our finest skill. Other's did that for us the weekend of his memorial. One memory: My uncle timid to spread my dad's ashes, his son encouraging him, me telling him I taste my dad's ashes when I spread them (more calcium in my diet doesn't hurt), and my sister holding my daddy's ashes. We all marched to the dock like ducks. Shaky dock (like being on a boogie board), high winds, sunshine, ashes, ducks in a row: Me, Tom, Ty (cousin), Sky, Jennifer, and Elizabeth. Tom spoke to "Rudy Kazootie" (it is what he called my dad) and then we all held our hands into the wind and released. It was one of those cathartic moments one rarely experiences in life. We all ate ashes that day as we threw them, of course the wind turned on us and put them back in our faces. My dad loved to play funny tricks and he loved magic. Embrace. Remembrance.

The rest of the month put me in motion to return to Bozeman. I realized in mid-September that I had finally "come home" and began making my connections with the town. Entering the professional world here in Bozeman, I have had to get through the comments such as, "I don't know if she really has that much experience," "Do you really think she knows what she is doing? It is birth after all." People generally questioning a new practitioner, this is normal. I would hear these comments and they would fire me up. Yet, I know my experience and all the training I went through and getting it into my community needs time. Just like a garden, like a relationship, like a descent: they all need time and room to breathe in order to grow.

With that, September was busy. Lots of commuting back and forth. A new study from Canada came out in August, stating that birth with a registered midwife at home was as safe as a birth with a physician or midwife in the hopsital. The craze of H1N1 vaccine and a rash of released information in the media. This sent all my new mothers spinning with questions and I felt like every week my answer changed. It now comes down to making an informed decision, when we all know at some point in our health care we just want to be told WHAT TO DO. That is not my job, unless it's in birth and it's an urgent action that need to occur. My role as a midwife is to inform and educate, encouraging my clients along the way to make decisions in their healthcare that are right for the individual. Another great thing that happened in September, Missoula, Montana found out that they would have a birth center again. Finally, I expanded my roles and connections with local midwives, as we all go in individual directions. Even with Mercury Retrograde for most of September, which tends to hold us back and consider restructuring what we've already created, my work was done and forward movement began.

As Mercury went direct on 29 September, my client began her journey into laborland. I received calls all day long. My clients live 1.5 hours away, so I was in my own laborland that day. Preparing and doing and waiting and doing. The sound of my pager no longer sends me into heart attack mode. It's a noise that takes me a second to realize where it's coming from and by no means is the sound of a pager meant to be pleasant. 4:45pm @ a trailhead, I got the call to be preparing to head northwest. 6:15 pm, they called and I was on my way. When I arrived at the house, the momma had a beautiful labor pattern and was supported by warm and loving and excited family. She labored quickly. At 00:59 on 09.29.09, little Bannack was birthed into this world on the floor of his family's bathroom. It was refreshing to have a land birth, not a water birth. Going from "Sea to Summit" this night would take a little more encouragement and the toilet was the way. She labored in water, birthed on earth.

For many providers, the place of birth occurs within our comfort zone. I realized with this birth, my comfort zone for birth is inside of me and that this work is right for me. Where the actual birth occurs does not matter to me. I have had lots of great work in life, and no other work feels so right to me. In this work I know when to say "I don't know" and I find a way to learn or know. This work is work that feeds me, yet it's work that I can leave. Sure, it's work that is woven into my cellular structure, and there is so much to be passionate about in life. So much to live for and thrive from and release in and play with and love. And from that birth, I was reconnected with just that aspect of love. For me, living from a place of love makes me walk on this earth with more joy, purpose and flow.

I dreamt of a birth last night, that doesn't happen a lot in my sleep time. It was a friend of mine, we were at home, this baby crowned and came out easily and sweetly into the arms of their parents, and I even remember my purple gloves. Surprises granted and love emanating. Maybe it's because Sara sent me her birth story from her blog, Walk Slowly Live Wildly, and I watched it twice or three times. I don't know, but the dream sits with me this morning as I dive into writing this after a long blog break and also dive into Quickbooks. Maybe a reminder of how lucky I am for this life. Now, back to running a business, making lists, paying bills, entering labs, and doing insurance billing. This dream skirts me out of a weekend of skiing with a girlfriend that made me feel like I was flying, a tour adventure on Saturday with a good man, and then a slow Sunday that ended with a baby shower and teaching Yoga Nidra. Home. Sleep. Dream. Wake. Work. Play. Love.

Those are the months behind me. I can say that I am slow to blog, and hopefully the next few entries will be from others as the intention for this blog was to get contributors and connecting vital and "green" communities. Collaborating our energies to create strong communities. Winter's upon us and I am thrilled.